Hi friends! This week has been all about sleep, in particular, how to train a baby to get more of it at the right time (i.e. 12 hours at night). We’re making progress!
On Monday I sent out Letter No. 13 about my birth experience and the wild ride that is being a new mother. I would love to hear your thoughts. And here are 10 things I consumed / enjoyed / considered this week:
An interview with the librettist who wrote the Moby-Dick opera, which is coming to The Met next week. I agree that there is so much about Moby-Dick that is operatic, and I like that Jack Heggie’s score has been described as “delineating individuals and ideas with quasi-Wagnerian motifs.” The last contemporary opera I saw was the controversial The Death of Klinghoffer, and I wasn’t a huge fan despite the interesting subject matter and elegiac choruses. I think it’s because I generally do not like minimalist music (à la Philip Glass) and prefer singing to spoken monologues. It is opera, after all! I do have high hopes for Moby-Dick.
So many articles and resources on sleep training. I posted a poll on Instagram this week asking if two months is too early to start sleep training and got lots of great feedback and advice. The consensus is yes, it’s a bit too early to start in earnest, but in general, some kind of sleep training plan is a good idea for both the parents and the baby. People have very strong opinions on this topic, which makes sense because big, important issues like baby bonding and wellbeing (e.g., is it abusive to let your baby “cry it out”?), along with one’s sanity, are implicated. We’re using a hybrid approach at this point (nap and nighttime routines, deliberate feeding, a little crying) and it’s working well. That said, I totally understand parents who can’t stomach letting their baby cry it out for extended periods (even 10 minutes). For anyone interested, these were the most recommended plans and resources:
Cribsheet by Emily Oster
Twelve Hours’ Sleep By Twelve Weeks by Suzy Giordano
Taking Cara Babies classes and resources
The Full Feedings method
Luka’s Nanit camera feed. I always found it so weird when parents would whip out their phones to watch their babies sleeping, but I get it now.
The NYC ABC’s book by Mr. Boddington’s Studio, a favorite stationer.
This Marius Fabre wall-mounted soap, but I’ll leave the Aesop hand wash in the bathroom in case you find bar soap controversial.
An article on the Los Angeles fires by Kerry Howley, one of my favorite essayists. I always recommend her novel, Thrown (a review here), and more recently, this article on Andrew Huberman’s toxicity.
The sea treasures ballet flats from Chloé that (mercifully) sold out before I could purchase them. These wedges, however, are calling my name.
This piece from Bess Kalb lamenting Shiri, Kfir, and Ariel Bibas, the Israeli hostages whose remains were returned by Hamas last week. It’s a beautiful tribute from a writer I have come to respect. I first came across her Substack when this clever article was circulating last May. At the time, it seemed that other Jewish writers were either scared to criticize Israel’s war or vociferously defending it. Not Kalb — here’s an excerpt:
“If you are saying ‘Of course it is always a shame when civilians die,’ then say for it to stop. Then stop killing civilians. Then stop setting babies on fire. Because there are no military strategies that can be justified when children are on fire. And if you haven’t said it yet, or if you haven’t thought it yet, then it is time to see it now, and say it now. The children are on fire. Cease the fucking fire.”
Sadly, I have also seen a lot of hateful, genocidal rhetoric in response to the Bibas tragedy, which others have commented on as well. When the Empire State Building was lit up in orange in honor of Shiri, Kfir, and Ariel on February 26, I hope people also considered that if it was lit every night for each child killed in Gaza, it would be lit in their memory for 48 years.
A pink sunset over the Brooklyn Bridge, which reminded me that I actually like Dumbo despite the never-ending road work and noise.
Have a lovely weekend, everyone! I’m still thinking up Letter No. 14, so if there’s anything you’d like me to write about please send your ideas my way. xoJess.